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If you have experienced impostor syndrome or are currently experiencing it, you need to know that you are not alone. Research has shown that nearly 70% of individuals will experience signs and symptoms of impostor phenomenon at least once in their life time . In the legal profession, Surveys suggest impostor syndrome is prolific, with 74% of lawyers experiencing it at some point in their careers.
It will interest you to know that celebrities and accomplished individuals are also not immune to this syndrome. The legendary poet and activist Maya Angelou, who won the Presidential Medal of Freedom and received nominations for a Pulitzer Prize and a Tony Award, once said about herself, “I have written 11 books, but each time I think, ‘Uh oh, they’re going to find out now! I’ve run a game on everybody, and they’re going to find me out.'”
Albert Einstein also suffered from feelings that he did not measure up. He essentially referred to himself as a fraud when he stated that “the exaggerated esteem in which my lifework is held makes me very ill at ease. I feel compelled to think of myself as an involuntary swindle to have been struck by it.”
Facebook’s Sheryl Sandberg has often admitted to feeling like an impostor at times. In her book, Lean In, she shares that when she was a member of the Phi Beta Kappa honor society at Harvard, she did not feel like she deserved to be there. She wrote in her book: “Every time I took a test, I was sure that it had gone badly. And every time I didn’t embarrass myself — or even excelled — I believed that I had fooled everyone yet again. One day soon, the jig would be up.”
Former CEO of Starbucks’, Howard Schultz admitted to feeling undeserving and insecure. In an interview with The New York Times, Schultz said, “Very few people, whether you’ve been in that job before or not, get into the seat and believe today that they are now qualified to be the CEO. They’re not going to tell you that, but it’s true.”
Lastly, Sonia Sotomayor, the first Hispanic Supreme Court justice, also had admitted to feeling like a fraud and not fitting in throughout her life. Growing up in the Bronx in a modest home with her single mother and brother, Sotomayor never thought of herself as a likely candidate for Princeton University. As she once said in a speech, “I have spent my years since Princeton, while at law school and in my various professional jobs, not feeling completely a part of the worlds I inhabit. I am always looking over my shoulder wondering if I measure up.”
It is hard to comprehend that all these people that we look up to as mentors and role models also deal with impostor syndrome. Hard to comprehend but comforting. What this shows is that fraudulent feelings can strike anyone, no matter how brilliant or accomplished they are.
What is Impostor Syndrome?
Now that we know that just about anyone can get struck by impostor syndrome, what really is syndrome and what are the signs and symptoms? Impostor syndrome is a collection of feelings of inadequacy that persist despite evident success. A person struck with impostor syndrome has a persistent fear of being exposed as a “fraud”. Such a person will doubt him or herself continually and/or minimizes their accomplishments. From the examples I have already sighted, you can see that these feelings are often prevalent in high-achieving people. That should tell you something about yourself if you are experiencing this syndrome.
Some of the symptoms of impostor syndrome include lack of self-confidence, feelings of inadequacy, constant comparison to other people, distrust in one’s own intuition and capabilities and negative self-talk. In professional settings, typical examples include, taking on extra work to make sure you are “doing it all”, shrugging off accolades and not applying to job postings unless you meet every single requirement.
How to Overcome Impostor Syndrome with Emotional Intelligence
- Take a Pause and Rewire Your Brain
When you feel insecure or inadequate, take a pause and assess the situation. You need to recognize that whatever you are feeling, or thinking is not necessarily the objective truth. It is just a version of how your brain is initially reacting to the situation.
The truth is impostor syndrome will not go away on its own and you cannot wish away your self-doubt. But you can silence your inner critic by rewiring your brain with evidence-based thoughts that allow you to evaluate yourself realistically rather than emotionally. You can literally talk your way out of negative perspectives. Here are some examples:
Negative thought: I am not as good a lawyer as people think I am.
Evidence-based thought: I am a great lawyer. My track record proves it!
Negative thought: I only got this far because I work hard. I am really not that smart.
Evidence-based thought: Of course, I am smart. My brains, talent, and hard work got me here!
Negative thought: I won this time, but next time I may not.
Evidence-based thought: I have proven that I am a winner, and I will win again!
- Temper your Expectations of Yourself
People that struggle with impostor syndrome frequently hold themselves to a standard of perfection that is not sustainable or achievable. If you are like this, you may convince yourself you are failing. It is better for you to temper expectations by using scaling techniques to evaluate your performance. For example, if you have a list of 10 things to accomplish and you accomplish 9 out of 10, it is more effective to say you have accomplished 90 percent of your plans, as well as reminding yourself that 90 percent is still an “A”. People who are emotionally intelligent understand that feeling a bit behind everyone else is part of life. Instead of giving in to the fear and inadequacies, they continue to show up instead.
- Build a Case
Seek for information from the world around you to assess the facts that either support or disprove your emotional reactions to your feelings of inadequacy. Keep a file of compliments you receive from clients and people or a board of your accomplishments, training, and track record. Next time you feel those inadequacies cropping up, refer to your file of compliments and accomplishments. By doing this, you can properly evaluate your feelings and confirm if they are based on reality or not.
- Accept Good While Waiting for Perfect
In a knowledge economy, people need to be continuous learners. As technology, trends, and workplace matters change, it is easy to feel left behind. To counter this, it is important to have a growth mindset and acknowledge that you will not be good at everything at the same time as everyone else. Whenever you feel inadequate or intimated, add the word “yet” at the end of your sentence, for example, “I don’t know how to draft XYZ agreement yet”. Doing this puts the emphasis back on your development and growth and allows you to focus on the future.
- Seek Perspective
While in the grip of impostor syndrome, finding confidence can seem like a challenge—especially when you are the high-achieving person who everyone else goes to for advice and pep talks. It can be difficult to turn the tables and ask for help. You however need to be vulnerable to get the help you need. Find a trusted friend, colleague, or mentor who can help you process what you are feeling and address it. This is an important step in leaving these feelings behind.
Feeling like an impostor hurts, so naturally, what you want is to feel differently. But the feelings may not change in a long while. This is why you cannot wait until you feel confident to take action. Keep taking on greater responsibility and stretching your goals. Do the things that scare you, while continuing to normalize and reframe. Over time, you will start to believe the new thoughts and your feelings will slowly catch up.
Most importantly, please practice self-compassion. Be kind to yourself. Rome was not built in a day.
